We have to realize that not everyone is going to come to a traditional church or even wants to fit in a traditional church. Most importantly, and please hear me say this; we need to be ok with it! The faster we are ok with it, the faster we can go and reach people.
I have been a part of several churches and I desperately tried to get more people to come to church. There were some success stories I could tell you about, but it usually ended up with the one’s and two’s showing up and the church numbers would usually even out by the end of the year. The reality is that most people are not interested or ready to come to our churches because of where they are in their life, and of course most churches are typically geared towards Christians, not non-Christians. We have to remember this.
We also have to account for language, culture, and economic differences. Of course there are some exceptions, but if you look around in your church body, most people look the same as you because you fit that church culture. It is okay if people don’t fit in your church culture, but everyone needs an opportunity to learn about Jesus that fits within their own culture or comfort.
What is the traditional churches main method of evangelism? It is usually inviting people to church. To the church that you love. You think to yourself, I love it, so everyone else surely will love it also. I have done it, and you probably have too. The motive is not wrong. Again you love your church. Nothing wrong with that.
The problem is, not everyone is like you. Not everyone comes from the same background and culture. Not everyone comes from the same economic level as you do. Not everyone is going to like your expression of church and we shouldn’t be offended by it. That is reality and it is natural. We are all different.
Now by all means, if you truly think someone you are going to invite is going to fit, then do it. Most importantly, if you think God wants you to invite them, then do it. But I am sure that often we can invite people without thinking about the consequences. When we invite people to church as our first method of “evangelism”, we need to first stop and think, “what is going to be the impact of this ask.”
What are those consequences or the effects that we are not thinking about? I’ll give you 4 main reasons not to invite everyone to church.
Number 1: You might actually miss the opportunity to share with them about Jesus because they might be turned off or even offended by the church you bring them to. How many times have you entered a church or been invited to a new church by a friend and have been turned off or offended because you didn’t like it. It has probably happened to all of us.
Offense can happen in several ways. Cultural differences, economic differences. Something the preacher says that the person you invited just doesn’t understand.
This is especially true about other cultures. For example, it might not even cross our mind about the clothes we are wearing, but other cultures are very aware. If a Muslim walks into your church and sees a woman wearing a dress that shows her shoulders, then they will probably be offended. If that offends you or somebody else in your church, well, that’s a different issue. We have to remember, Jesus commands us to reach all people, that’s the goal. And sometimes we have to give up some things for that to happen. And we need to understand this.
Also with Muslims, the music will probably offend them or at the least, the music will be very foreign to them because there is no music in Mosques. Worship music is not associated with worship in Islam.
Even an everyday American who has not been to church might not like the worship style of that church. They could be turned off by Charismatic or very traditional Baptist worship. You never know.
A persons economic level might come into play. A poor person might not like or at least feel comfortable around wealth. For example, high class cars or clothes that most people in the church are wearing might make this person feel out of place. And again, we need to understand this.
Something the preacher says could offend. We don’t know what is going on in peoples lives. They could be offended by comments regarding abortion, sex, and especially the gay lifestyle. Conversations on these subjects are usually better discussed in private with someone they have a trusting relationship with.
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The second reason is the missed opportunity to reach more people. What I mean by that is, missing out on reaching more people from the community that person came from. This has happened to me when I brought someone to church. He was a gang member. He ended up loving the church which you would think is a great thing. But he ended up cutting off the community from where he came. With our help in the beginning, he was reaching out to his community until we invited him to church and then he stopped because he got so wrapped up in the new community he was in.
As for other cultures, often times, something we don’t think about and we will talk much more about in future episodes, is when we share Jesus or invite a person from another culture or another religion to church without even considering his or her family members, those family members or friends can completely cut off that person. This is a reality with people of other cultures and religions. We will discuss it more another time, but it’s best to always share or include the whole family so they can learn together.
3. The third reason is replication. If a person is invited into a traditional church, he or she may likely conclude that this is how all churches are. That person will not be able to replicate that church if he or she has a desire to reach their friends. The church has a big building. A paid staff. A worship band, and one expert preacher. It is impossible to replicate for that person.
In this situation, starting a bible study with this person with a few friends or family members is going to be much more effective. This is called simple church. This is going to be the better solution because anyone in my experience can lead a simple church. The person who has experienced simple church can then show more people how to do simple church. We will talk more about simple church and starting bible studies in the upcoming episodes.
4. The fourth reason is that most churches are not equipped to help the unchurched in certain situations. For example, someone brings a prostitute to church, what is that church going to do? What about a low-income drug addict? I could give you a huge list. The point is that a lot of churches are not equipped for this and the church may end up hurting the situation more than helping, even with good intentions. All of the sudden, they are dealing with issues most of us have never faced. That person would be better off forming or joining a group who has faced the same issues. For example, starting a bible study for women coming out of the sex industry. I have seen great things come out of this. Believe me, the women know how to take care of themselves and each other. They have great understanding and compassion for each other. They know how to help each other.
Now you might say, if I don’t invite people to church, then they might never hear about Jesus. What else can I do? Great question.
Of course I do not mean stop inviting all people in every situation, but if you want to reach more people, instead of inviting every single person to church as your main method of evangelism, my advice would be to take church to people. What do I mean by that? It means to connect with some people outside of the church (most of us all have many friends outside of church), gather some of them together, and simply give them a place where they can learn about Jesus in their own environment where they feel comfortable.
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